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Ask Tampa Bay | Help! I Farted During Sex!

Hey Ask Tampa Bay,

I farted while having sex with this girl for the first time. I’m not dating her, but I see her at school everyday and I was hoping we could go out again. Should I just give up now?

-Flatulent Fella


 

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Margeaux Says: First of all, I literally LOL-ed when I read this so thank you for farting during sex. It really made me feel good about myself. Now, when you say “give up” do you mean on life or your pursuit of this girl? I say don’t give up on either. I don’t necessarily think your “fucktulence” is a deal breaker, but it depends on her sense of humor, your level of attractiveness, and whether or not she noticed. She may be the kind of girl who enjoys nice potty humor and she thought it was funny. Also, if you are smokin’ hot and therefor slightly intimidating you have humanized yourself and given her the upper hand. Finally, depending on what was going on at the time and the noise level of your fartsplosion, she may not have even noticed. I think you should just go about your business as if it never happened, ask her out again and see what she says. If she says no, you can act righteous and indignant because she is so shallow. Farts happen!

 

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Rusty Says: “Give up” now? You already had sex! What’s to give up? You did it! Mission accomplished!mission accomplished

 

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Rion Says: Okay. Uhm. Wow. Well, first let me just say that I feel very ill equipped to offer anyone advice that has to do with anything sexual in any way. Let’s just say my “basement” hasn’t be used for “storage” in quite some time. And second, I also shy away from acknowledging that flatulence even exists whenever possible. This is, unless I’m joking about it, but never ever when it’s alive and real. So, I’m basically “not your type” and could be doing some serious projecting. You have been warned. My guess is, you probably won’t be able to date this girl, BUT not because of the fart (yay!). I mean, you’re not dating and you already had sex? Sounds like she may have just wanted something casual. But let’s say that she was interested in something more; she probably thinks you’re a monster now… I mean, you farted during sex… Oh! Or maybe she didn’t notice! If she does end up bringing it up to you, just say it was your climax moans. Yeah. Go with that. Climax moans.

 

Roy Says: That sounds like a normal Saturday night to me. But seriously, you most likely had a few beers, not the healthiest “food.” What the hell did you think was going to happen? The problem with this question is that I need more information. Was something said after it happened by you or by her? If you laughed that was good. People fart, boys and girls. Grow up jokers! If you ask her out again and she says no I’d say you are probably just a scumbag she wants nothing to do with. Don’t chalk it up to your inability to hold back gas in very sensual situations. Also, maybe she’s in the minority that doesn’t think farts are fucking hilarious. Either way, call her. What’s the worst that could happen.

 

Nicole Says: I would say just pretend it didn’t happen and ask her out again. Most likely, if she likes you, she’ll also pretend it didn’t happen. If she brings it up in a mean way or acts weird about it, then you can just say “never mind” and go through your life confident that she wasn’t the one and she’s a terrible person. I’m a big believer that you always regret what you didn’t do more than what you did do. It’s possible you may go through life always wondering what might have been between you two if you had just sucked it up and plowed through this one anxiety filled encounter.

 

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